Since we are both fully vaccinated, I decided to make a trip to California to see my mom this month. The night before I left, my husband, Denis, saw me making onigiri (Japanese rice balls) and asked if it was for my trip. My reaction disturbed me in retrospect. I said, “No! Of course not! I don’t want people seeing me eating onigiri in public!”
As an Asian American in the US right now, the possibility of being harassed or worse, threatened or attacked, has been on my mind recently. My decision not to bring the onigiri to eat on my trip felt prudent and justified. But when thinking of our conversation later, I felt a deep sadness, not only about the present situation but for my past self.
My instinct to not call attention to my “Asian-ness” brought back memories of being made fun of in 1st grade for the onigiri my mother packed for my lunch. I was so excited to use my brand new plastic lunch box at school. Being a 1st grader meant I got go to school for a whole day and eat lunch with my friends.
When some boys saw what I was eating they started pointing and pretending to do karate and kung fu and speak psuedo-Chinese. All my excitement evaporated, and it its place I felt a deep shame.
Thankfully my lunch-mate, who was white, said, “C’mon, Missy. Let’s eat somewhere else. It stinks here!” and made a face at the boys.
After that day I told my mom to never ever make onigiri for lunch again - only sandwiches. When she asked, “Why? Onigiri is your favorite!” I angrily retorted, “No, I only want SANDWICHES!” I was too ashamed to say why.
Forty-nine years and a couple of weeks later, author and illustrator, Grace Lin, related a disturbing story that echoed my own: Her daughter returned to in-person school recently, and during her first week back, at lunch a boy told her that “the Chinese caused the Corona virus and that they hated Chinese people.”
Grace said that “while it is heartbreaking, it is not surprising” because the stories of hate told about Asian Americans has been going on for such a long time. We are often seen as “the other” — often as foreigners, rather than Americans.
The exchange between the boy and her daughter led Grace to take action and organize a wonderful online exhibition here at the Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art, called Asians, Everyday.
The aim of the show is to combat these negative, hateful stories and replace them with stories of Asian Americans who share a common thread of humanity. All 26 of the books in the exhibitions tell stories of every day Asian Americans living ordinary American lives.
The collection is not complete, as Grace herself admits. There many more books beyond this group to choose from (which wasn’t the case at all when I was a child and I think that’s a great thing)!
I am honored to have a piece from Dumplings for Lili, my newest book, included.
Some of my friends’ beautiful books were included such as Anna Kim’s, Danbi Leads the School Parade, Huy Voun Lee’s, Like a Dandelion, Grace Lin’s, A Big Bed for Little Snow, Like a Dandelion, Maya Lin, illustrated by Dow Phumiruk, and Amy Wu and the Perfect Bao, illustrated by Charlene Chua.
There were also a host of books I wasn’t familiar with that I now want to run out and get, such as Laxmi’s Mooch, by Shelly Anand, illustrated by Nabi H. Ali, The Twin’s Blanket, by Hyewon Yum, Under My Hijab by Hena Khan, illustrated by Aaliya Jaleel, The Most Beautiful Thing, by Kao Kalia Yang, illustrated by Khoa Le, and I Dream of Popo by Livia Blackburne, illustrated by Julia Kuo, and so many others!
All of the books in the Asians, Everyday exhibition can be purchased here.
Please visit and spread the word! It’s so important for Asian American kids to see mirror images of themselves in books! It’s equally important for non-Asian Americans to see a side of American life they may not be aware of. Through learning and compassion, there’s hope for positive change. ❤️